Tuesday, March 28, 2006

I think I'm losing my mind.

I always used to take great pride in my sense of direction. I was a boy scout when I was younger, and I could efforlessly find my way around in the wilderness in New York City or anywhere in between. If my friends and I were going anywhere I would be the one who always knew where we were and how to get to where we were going. Since I've moved to North Chicago it's been completely different. I get lost more often than I actually find my way the first time. And it's not just a little lost. It's always for a frickin' hour and I end up 10 miles away from where I want to go in the opposite direction.

And this is despite the fact that I normally know where I am. Every time I get lost I carefully check my map when I get home and see what mistake I made and what all the narmby streets are and then I carry an actual map so I can always know exactly where I am. And I normally do know where I am, but I still can't find my way back to where I want to go. Several times I've ended up on the right street going in the wrong direction for miles, when I didn't actually think I was even near that street.

Today, I went out to buy some groceries today at the local store which is only three miles away and which I had already been to several times. admittedly I got lost (in different ways!) two of those times. It's very frustrating and dispiriting because I feel like I'm losing my mind, and I don't even want to leave campus to drive anywhere because I'm afraid I only have an even chance of reaching somewhere uneventfully. Normally, I just keep going calmly, but today I just got so frustrated I wanted to tear my hear and break things. I even got lost walking down the street last month. Aaargh.


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